Sunday, November 18, 2012

Have You Seen One?

My mum was sent an email by a church friend a few months ago, she printed it out and shared it with me, I just recently found it in my room again and thought I'd share it.

Now I'm not sure how true these are, they may be just typical jokes that get changed around a bit but I thought they were quite hilarious when I read them!

Idiot Sighting 1:

I went through the McDonald's driveway window and I gave the cashier a $5 dollar note.
Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her 25c. She said, 'you gave me too much money.' I said, 'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar coin back.'
She sighed and went to get the manager who asked me to repeat my request.
I did so, and he handed me back the 25c and said 'We're sorry but we don't do that kind of thing.' The cashier then proceeded to give me back 75 cents in change.

Do not confuse the people of MacD's in Shepperton Vic.

Idiot Sighting 2:

We had to have the garage door repaired.
The repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener.
I thought for a moment, and said that we had the largest one made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower.
He shook his head and said, 'You need a 1/4 horsepower.'
I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4 and he said, 'NOOO, it's not, Four is larger than two.'

We haven't used that repairman since. Happened in Bankstown NSW.

Idiot Sighting 3:

I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbour call the local counsil to request the removal of the WOMBAT CROSSING sign on our road. The reason: 'Too many wombats are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.'

Story from Bauple QLD

Idiot Sighting 4:

My daughter went to a mexican takeaway and ordered a taco. She ask the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.' He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg lettuce.

From Castle Hill, Sydney

Idiot Sighting 5:

I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked 'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?'
To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'
He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'

This happened at Melbourne Airport.

Idiot Sighting 6:

The pedestrian light on the corner beeps when it's safe to cross the street. I was crossing with an 'intellectually challenged' co-worker of mine. She asked if I know what the beeper was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she responded, ' What on earth are blind people doing driving?!'

She is a government employee in the Adelaide P.O. SA

Idiot Sighting 7:

When my husband and I arrived at a car dealership to pick up our car after a service, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanics working feverishly to unlock the driver's side door.
As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked.
'Hey,' I announced to the technician, 'it's open!'. His reply, 'I know. I already did that side.'

Holden Dealership Townsville QLD.

Stay Alert!!

They walk among us...!

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